Spilling

That’s the sum of it
All there is to say
All that I feel
All that I hope
All that I want
All that I fear

The pain is alive
Stretches to squeeze my heart
Its weight strains every breath
Feeding on rejection
Strengthened by disdain
A familiar presence

Unimaginable
That you would turn blind eyes
To sincere words from a tormented soul
Heartfelt words only meant to heal
Brought forth with love and offered with friendship
Hope and optimism still rank high.

Do you fear contamination?
Are you so repelled that even
Perfunctory and polite response
Is more than you can conjure up?
One plus one does not make three
Baffling, no logic, no closure.

Idle curiosity is not my driver
A carefree soul floats above sheer gossip
The downtrodden spirit welcomes truth
Whether logical underpinnings or articles of faith
Dictate behavior, still desperate minds
Seek solace.

What next? Surely no more
Nothing left to say
And someday once again
Nothing left to feel
For now the tears still flow
Unresolved tormented.

Left with pieces of my broken heart
Mixed with debris of internal storms
friendship eagerly welcomed
As the natural progression of our association
Now scared out of my mind
Without you in my life at all.